TO........All FROM......Mike Steiner SUBJECT...Some more humor??? DATE......0531pm 23-Aug-

TO........All

FROM......Mike Steiner

SUBJECT...Some more humor???

DATE......05:31pm   23-Aug-91


CONTROL...EID:37ca 17178be0
I don't know whether this is funny or scary.  I found it on internet.
Dear Friends,
It really pains me to deliver to you this news.  I was walking around 
in Chicago
the other day with a friend from out East, and a lady walked up to me, 
giving
me a pamphlet that pretty much disassembles what each of us is doing, 
and makes
perfect sense of all of it.  Because this was given to me by another human 
being,
it's undoubtedly true.
---------------------------------------------------------------
IN OCT. 1992, JESUS IS COMING AGAIN
[misc. 3 pages of stuff deleted]
* SECRETS OF 666
"And he causes all, the small and the great, and the rich and
the poor, and the free man and the slaves, to be given a mark
on their right hand, or on their forehead, and he provides that
no one would be able to buy or sell, except the one who has the
mark, either the name of the beast or the number of his name.
Here is the wisdom.  Let him who has understanding calculate
the number of the beast, for the number is that of a man,
and his number is six hundred and sixty-six."
(Rev. 13:17-18)
Soon money will be useless and in place of it, the mark will be
put on the forehead or on the right hand, and this will be the
only way to buy and sell.  Bar codes of U.P.C. is the 666 mark
and is already all over supermarkets, hospitals, and libraries.
Mr. William Garrison already talked about the #666 which is
universal code number [sic].  The computer itself is #666.
A=6, B=12, C=18, D=24, E=30, ...[deleted]... Z=156
  C    O    M    P    U     T     E    R
(18) (90) (78) (96) (126) (120) (30) (108)   = 666
[You have to envision this -- picture of guy with
 bar code on forehead, big #s in it "666," and
 picture of bar code and how it supposedly equates
 to 666]
*#6 is computer's special code number and universal computer's
number is also #6.
The computer is golden calf of this new age.  The laser beam
number given will distribute number to the body in 1/1000000000
sec.
Nronks=666, Devil & Sheol=666, Computer=666, People & Sin=666,
Lucifer & Hell=666, Devil & Dragon=666, Mark of Beast=666,
Bar Code of U.P.C. mark is 666.
"Computer," his nickname is "the beast."  "The beast" is the
nickname for the "Super Computer" at the E.E.C. Center in
Belgium.
Dr. Jack Van Impe exposed that #666 will control all the people
in the whole world with the super computer.  This computer is
connected to S.W.F.T. World Bank Link Computer located in
Brussels.  Center Computer located in Luxembourg.
[Wow, man, like lots of throughput on that puppy!]
Every credit card has their own special code number,
111=mutual charge card
222=money charge card
333=Visa
444=Master Card
555=American Express
666=?
777=Diners Club
888=Carte Blanche
900=Special Services
999=Universal charge card
[stuff to end of brocure deleted -- more biblical quotes]
Okay, so you heard it here first.  Here are some things I think
we can all learn from all of this, and what effect it might
have on the Macintosh community overall.
* We tango with the beast, therefore we ultimately receive hellfire
  and damnation.  At least we tangle with the "right" beast.
* Satan loves really powerful machines (RISC?), so if you see
  him at a party (well, I have friends who I've seen at parties
  claiming to "see" even weirder shit), you have something in
  common to talk about.
* They really need a network that has great bandwith to not only
  control every other computer, but everyone in the world too.
  I think it's time we get rid of TCP/IP for SatanTalk.
* Gimme one of those "Universal credit cards," so I don't need
  a wallet full of those stupid brand-name cards.  Hell, just
  give me a bar code on my forehead.
* Satan digs assembly language, for his "universal computer"
  must indeed have its OS written in assembly -- this monster
  must be fast!
* Satan is an MS-DOS user, cause those "damn windows" take all
  that processing time -- there are souls to take here.
* Each of us already knows how to talk to the devil -- all you
  need is MPW or THINK.
* So THAT'S where hexidecimal, binary, and octal came from!
* We should all write buggy code that is not 32-bit clean,
  so Satan's evil processes bomb.  Hey, I can think of a lot
  of people who fit this category!!! ;) 
* There will be a port of Apple's rumored "PINK" OS for Satan's
  evil computer, so he can drag little people icons into the
  little fire pit icon.
* Someone in the city is smoking lots of dope, but wouldn't you if
  you knew that you only had a year to live before judgment???
Guess those of us who think that personal computers can change
the world are correct -- we're not doing good, just ultimately
leading ourselves down the path of ultimate doom, leading to
the ultimate destruction of the world.
This is some pretty nutty shit, but I found it pretty funny.
Hope you do too.  If not, I'm sure I'll receive flames -- but hey!
We all will, for we're just flirting with the beast, no?
Back to my lil' beastie,
Steve Klingsporn
klingspo@mozart.cs.colostate.edu
 
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